8.30.2012

I'm Weaning Myself...

Once there was a girl who married a boy. The first 12 hours of the union were bliss and then she realized that he snored...really, really, really loudly.

Fast forward 6 months and said girl is cranky because she hasn't had a good night's sleep in well, 6 months. She realizes that she has 2 options...divorce or suffocation. Not wanting to beat Britney Spears' short marriage record and not particularly fond of jail time, she takes the advice of a friend and begins sleeping with earplugs in her ears. Sleep returns, the marriage is intact, and she lets the boy live.

Fast forward 7 1/2 years, and the girl and boy are expecting a baby girl. And it hits her, she is going to need to hear every bump in the night...she is going to have to give up the ear plugs...she knows that sleep is going to be a thing of the past anyway, but she has been enjoying this cocoon of silence while sleeping for 7 1/2 years...and so, with only 6 weeks to go until the princess arrives, the girl must wean herself.

Heaven help us all!

6 comments:

Jill said...

Eeeeep! I wish you luck...Honestly, it's one of the few reasons I'm happy I'm single. Having to share my bed - with a SNORER, at that - sends shivers down my spine! ;)

You're right, though, sleep is about to become very secondary anyways!!! hee hee...

Connie said...

Oh my gosh! Yes. You have to wean yourself.

I'm finally used to my husband's snoring. But it took a long time.

Cynthia said...

Good luck with the weaning (and of course the delivery of Princess!!)
You might want to ask a doctor about his snoring. It could be a symptom of sleep apnea, and they might be able to stop the snoring!! It's worth checking in to.

Marian Hertzog said...

If he needs a CPAP make sure he uses it. You will be so thankful. I did not sleep well until my DH got one! Prayers and blessings for all of you!

Impulsive Addict said...

Loved this post!!! M snores approximately 6.7 seconds after his sweet big head hits the pillow. I take advantage of the opportunity to punch, hit, and/or kick him until he stops long enough for me to fall asleep!

Rebecca said...

before long the sound of a little one sleeping will have you at a peaceful rest